Sisters-in-smut

I have long found a haven in books. I distinctly remember the first book I couldn't put down and binged in a day at the age of eleven. It has been a life-long love.

Romance books have always been there at the top of my list and, naturally, a few years ago I veered towards a genre called romantasy (I only recently learned what it's called). Or elf smut. Or fairy smut. Whatever. 

It was only a couple of days ago that I came upon the Best. Review. Ever. by a husband about his wife's obsession with a new romantasy series. I think it summarizes the whole process in a concise, yet angry way. 

And to all my sisters-in-smut out there: if it makes you smile and oooh and aaaah - you are doing it right!

Know what you're good at

Here are some of the things I excel at (in no particular order):

• Meeting someone and immediately forgetting their name and face. Gets awkward when we meet again.
• Thinking I don't own any shoes, but in fact have about 10 pairs (7 of which are high-heeled and sparkly)
• Planning and organizing. 
• Scrabble.
• Shouting (mostly at the kids).
• Picking up stuff after everyone (normal mummy/wife superpower).
• Overthinking.
• Occasional procrastination.
• On and Off Complaining. Even though I can definitely get better at this one, there is room to grow there.

To be continued... (I excel at a lot of things!)

Star Pocket

I don't know if you are familiar with the term 'Star Pocket'. You are probably not, as it is something I only recently heard of and I am almost sure it is not out there. Yet.

So let me explain this obscure, but essential concept. Everyone has a Star Pocket, even if they don't know or call them something else. Simply put - it is where you keep all those amazing little and big moments in life when something extraordinarily miraculous happened to you - falling in love, meeting a good friend, having your baby, having your first kiss, enjoying the sun lying in a meadow on a summer day.

Yes, you got it - all the happy moments. And because we know life is never straightforward, we reach into the Star Pocket when we are in the midst of a slump, when life isn't going well for us. 

And all the good things in the Star Pocket just keep us going. Therefore, keep filling your Star Pocket - you never know when you will need it. Because you will. 

Hello, Dreaded Forties

When I turned forty, I didn't see it as that big of a deal. It's not as if something clicked and things changed overnight just because I was now officially in that dreaded decade. And, might I add, I was told this is the beginning of the end.

No such thing. Best decade of my life so far: 

I appreciate myself so much more. 

Using lessons learned as I have never before. I know well who I am.

Raising my kids with a confidence I didn't have in my 30s.

Going through a midlife crisis, which I strongly recommend to everyone, if done right (need a separate story for that). 

The Life of Marv

Jeez, what was this world coming to! In the good old days (1 hour ago) - when the air had been so much cleaner and the children much more polite - Marv's knees hadn't hurt as much. Now even his eyeballs reminded him he was getting older by the second. 

Marv remembered his childhood like it was yesterday (because it was). He had been a mischievous little brat, always ready to execute a complex slide over the water, risking bumping into one of the old folk and getting an earful. He remembered how the sun had shone and how the water had sparkled in his youth, how he had felt like 'the most vital link in the food web of freshwater ecosystems'. 

'Aaaah', Marv the Mayfly thought. Life is truly short and you have to live it to the fullest. All 24 hours of it. 

Footnote: I wrote this as part of a deal with my daughter, who has to write her own version. 

Faking it

I always wonder if I am a good parent. 

We were offered numerous books on parenting when we had our first child, but in the end it all comes to how you were raised and what your values as a person are. You go by instinct and that is the plain truth. Am I raising my kids well, will they learn the good things and possibly ignore the times when I lose it a little? 

I have come to a conclusion: I have absolutely no idea. The kids are growing well so far - learning from both the good and the bad. But what I am showing them is that my husband and I are both human - we hurt, we sometimes get mad without a good reason, we cry, we make mistakes. And I believe this is truly important - for the kids to see us - their parents - as people, not only as a figure of authority and as someone keeping them fed and dressed. 

Not sure if we are succeeding, but we will just keep faking it and hope for the best. Like all parents do.

Laugh or Cry?

Not sure how to even start this one...

I watched, for the lack of a better word, I will say an interview. With an Australian politician, from about 15 years ago. About a tanker, whose 'front fell off'. 

While watching it I had the strange sensation I am looking at a Monty Python sketch. The more I watched, the more the feeling grew. I am still not sure whether I should be laughing or crying. You decide.